Category Archives: Children with problems

‘MAKING AMERICA GREAT AGAIN’ SERIES – COMMENTARY ONE – MARRIAGE

MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Juanita Holloway-Walters

This is it; the one that caused writer’s block. The subject matter has done much to divide America, and all the way down to the family and close, warm, personal, friend level in society. A question: Why should I turn my back on my centuries old Christian beliefs of marriage, to pretend to embrace someone else’s beliefs – JUST BECAUSE THEY WANT ME TO THINK SOMETHING I AM NOT HARD WIRED TO THINK? It is a ridiculous proposition. I am praying the emotional blackmail of deceitful Political Correctness has run its course, and failed in America. We may be surprised at how fast certain aspects of the Politically Correct model of America may change over-night, if American Christians turn away from Secular Christianity fraught with agnostic, and even pagan beliefs.

It still confounds me as to how such a small segment of our population was hijacked by the enemy within, using the truly evil practices of Political Correctness to insert counter-culture ideals into the very core of our American Culture. The “latest estimate shows that 3.8% of our population actually identify as LGBT,” as per Gallup. (1) We can scarcely turn on the big or little screens without having the gay lifestyle crammed down our throats. The fabric of our Christian nation is weak to have allowed this content to be in the realm of 100% saturation of our children through school, through television, and through music.

SKREEEEECCCHHHHHHH! STOP! NEWS FLASH! THE LIONS SHARE OF BLAME FOR OUR POLITICALLY CORRECT BROKEN AMERICA IS NOT THE 3.8% OF OUR POPULATION — IT IS A LARGE PORTION OF THE 75% OF AMERICANS WHO SAY THEY ARE CHRISTIANS – but, do not follow the Commandments Jesus gave us; nor do they follow the Ten Commandments handed down to Moses from God. No Christian precept may have been violated more than the scriptures telling us about Marriage. How many married Christians are following what the Word of God says about marriage? What Baby Boomers passed down to our children, and grandchildren is a lack of respect for our heterosexual Christian marriage. If the institution of marriage had not been sorely abused, we would be a wholesome America not needing to “Make America Great Again.”

How many marriages failed because The Lord was not present in the marriage? I can tell you that The Lord was not present in my failed marriages. Then I got on my knees and asked the Lord to forgive me for having a victim mentality when it came to relationships with men. I did not know my scriptures well, and therefore, I had no reference of what life was all about. Because I did not know my Bible, I was totally without any real help. We exist for God’s glory, and if we are here for God’s glory, then we should know what pleases God. One day I prayed to understand the scriptures, and it was as if a light had been turned on in my soul, and in my mind. Not only do I understand the scriptures, but I also understand who is in the scriptures and why my understanding is so important to a happy life.

Not long after that, I prayed on my knees, and asked The Lord to pick me a husband who loved The Lord, would be faithful to me, and who would love me in all the ways I love. My marriage with John for two decades has been a miracle to me every day. The love and respect in the beginning has grown over the years. Hardships came and went without much fuss, because we had something bigger in our lives than teen aged children testing us at every turn, careers, wealth, or health issues. I look back and see much love and laughter every day of our marriage ordained by God. We pray to be an example to our loved ones, and to others . . . even to be a catalyst for others to improve their marriages. John and I see other good marriages, and we are further strengthened in the purpose of the gifts God has given each of us to be a help to you when we are able.

For Americans to “Make America Great Again,” America’s Christian population must renew their relationship with Christ, and renew their commitment to great marriages. Great marriages make great families. Great families make an involved citizenry that looks to local schools, churches, and community institutions with The Lord’s Christian Absolutes in mind. WE DO NOT CHECK OUR CHRISTIAN FAITH AT ANY DOOR, FOR ANYONE. If we are Christian, who we are is Christian to the bone.

Sadly, only a small percentage of today’s American Christian population has read The Bible. Because they do not know what their Bible says, they have nothing of encouraging value when it is most needed.
“Today, about one-third of American adults report reading the Bible once a week or more. The percentage is highest among Elders (49%) and lowest among Millennials (24%).” (2) The Word of God, contains the Moral Absolutes Christians need to live a wholesome life.  ‘All come short of His Glory’ (3); and when we have fallen short of His Glory, we are to repent, seek forgiveness, and move on in life without the need to keep going back to learn the same lesson over, and over again. We are to grow spiritually, for which there is much help in studying The Bible.

Satan, and his minions, exist to trip you up by giving you the Big Lie of Moral Relativism. It means that my faith is the faith of life, and someone else’s is the faith of death. Moral Relativism says that they are equal and both true. It also means that the death crowd believes their views should be taught to my children, and it is only fair for my children to be exposed to their minority faith. I do not believe in Moral Relativism, and cannot abide by such negative and lethal forces to be allowed anywhere near my children, and grandchildren.

The truth is that our marriages are a reminder of the relationship Christ has with His Church here on Earth. When we dishonor the millennium old tradition of Christian marriage, we are also dishonoring our relationship with Christ – we are The Church – Christ’s Church. Our marriages should be an example to all the goodness of Holy union with our spouse, and with our Lord as members of His Church. There are many scriptures about marriage, but this is the most excellent in my view:

“EPHESIANS 5:
“20 Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;

21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto The Lord.

23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the Church: and He is the saviour of the body.

24 Therefore as The Church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.

25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;

26 That He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by The Word,

27 That He might present it to Himself a glorious Church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.

29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as The Lord The Church:

30 For we are members of His body, of His flesh, and of His bones.

31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.

32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and The Church.

33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”

Not that John and I have the perfect marriage, for there is no such thing under the sun; however, we stand on 20+ years of the closest thing to it that either of us have ever seen. We have seen other good marriages, but ours is almost supernaturally excellent. The Lord matched us up – two givers. The love and mutual respect is a part of the success. I think that we like our male and female roles, and we enjoy being male and female as God made us down to the DNA in our cells. We have also been blessed beyond measure, and our prayers have all been answered. We do not forget to ask Him to help us attain needed medical help, as well as help for others. Some say we are lucky. I don’t believe in luck; I believe in recognizing the blessings in our lives without ceasing.

Solomon was the second son of David and Bathsheba. His mother worried that his father had taught him to be a womanizer. Bathsheba’s pet name for her son is Lemuel and we see in Proverb 31 the advice she imparts to him regarding a wife – a wife worthy of a King!!

PROVERB 31
10 
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

14 She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.”

We have witnessed in America the deliberate masculation of women by certain factions of our population, and the counter emasculation of men in that process. For every movement under the sun, there is a counter movement that occurs. Women hit their forties and wondered at their biological clocks tick, tick, ticking away, and the absence of available marriageable men. Many of these women became bitter and angry, without recognizing if they had played a part in the sad outcome . . . without asking for forgiveness for the error of their ways, and their biological clock alarms stopped ringing. Many men who turned from women, have not found the peace they were seeking. The saddest part in all of this is the effect it has had on the next two generations.

The studies of children in America is a hotbed of information. It matters not who did the study, or how scientific, there is always a group of naysayers. “Dr. Mark Regnerus is a University of Texas Sociologist who rocketed to fame – or infamy, depending on one’s views of homosexual parenting – in 2012 with the publication of his study about how well children are doing.” (4) Other studies from the LGBT crowd have proven to be “fixed” by the subjects in the study. Dr. Regnerus’ study skyrocketed because of his actual random sampling of a large study group. BUT, we can look to studies of children from broken homes, alcoholic homes, abusive home, welfare homes, and homes of any extreme element, to find that children from these homes are in an emotional pickle, just as the children in the Dr. Regnerus study.

Children need boundaries for themselves and their friends (so important), for their siblings, and for their parents – the rules of acceptable behavior – or Moral Absolutes. To find success in our lives, we need only look to our Lord and Savior, and what He tells us in the scriptures. My favorite place for Jesus advice is the book of Matthew, but they are found in all the Gospels, as well as the letters Jesus wrote to the churches in Revelation, and on every page of the Bible. The most important and widely read book since Jesus death and resurrection, is sadly not being read by all Christians. It is the only book that will help heal our Republic; and it is pivotal in American’s “Making America Great Again.” Without a return to Biblical Christianity, any attempts of restoring the Republic would be weak at best. This is where the healing must begin.

Copyright © 2016 by Juanita Holloway-Walters, All Rights Reserved

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More Bible verses about marriage for your own study. These plus the ones noted in the commentary above would make a good long-term small group study:

Genesis 2:18                                         Psalm 128:1-6               Proverbs 5:12-14
Proverbs 20:6-7                                     Malachi 2:13-14             1 Corinthians 7:3
Colossians 3:18-19                                1 Timothy 5:14              Hebrews 13:4

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(1) http://www.gallup.com/poll/183383/americans-greatly-overestimate-percent-gay-lesbian.aspx
(2) http://www.barna.com/research/the-bible-in-america-6-year-trends/#
(3) Romans 3:23
(4) http://www.cnsnews.com/commentary/lynn-wardle/childrens-sake-we-must-not-ignore-differences-between-heterosexual-and-same

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PART TWO – RUNNING IN CIRCLES – ANSWERS

I KNOW!!! What I wrote in Part One was personal, and shocking for that reason. Yes, but, this issue needs exploring to put it in a healthy perspective. It may be an almost exclusive WHITE MIDDLE CLASS issue – I don’t know for sure, and I certainly do not mean to leave anyone out of this group of Boomers due to my ignorance. First, for clarity: What you may, or may not, have perceived from Part One of my commentary is that I am very proud of my son, his soul-mate wife, and my grandchildren. How could he be my son and not be independent, immediately and passionately (inside his domain / home) family oriented, and successful at whatever he chooses to endeavor. When I do see him, he is very forthcoming with apology for his busy life, and never forgets to tell me he loves me. On many occasions over the years he has sincerely rewarded me with praise. I have a file full of Birthday, Mother’s Day, and Christmas Cards that say wonderful things – not just about his opinion of me – but also, about he and I. Over the last 5 years many people have contacted me privately to tell me their woes that almost mirror mine identically regarding our mostly absent Generation X children (Gen X). I believe I know of several reasons that work in conjunction with each other to have left us with the outcomes we are experiencing. We are a significant number of the Baby Boom Generation (Boomers) who are experiencing the loss of immediate and close relationship with our Gen X children.

1)   An easy one: Boomer’s Parents, and our schools were strict. When Boomers were children, we – who mostly spoke when we were spoken to – made up our minds that we would discipline our children in kinder ways, and listen to what our children had to say. OH boy!!! Speaking for me, I was an idiot. Before the last 20 years with John, I was for all practical purposes a single parent (even when previously married to another child to raise). What my children knew about manipulating me with guilt, even when they were five years old, would have shocked me if I had understood it at that time.

These Gen X children who voiced their opinions on everything under the sun have decided that the candy-xxx discipline we doled out was excessive. Right. Taking my son’s phone out of his bedroom until he brought his grades up, each and every time, caused my son to opine of how truly cruel I was. Well, always, within a week he would bring me notes from all teachers who would relay to me that his work was all turned in and his grade back up to an A or a B – depending on the subject. Discipline works.

One of the chief reasons these Gen Xers avoid us is their embarrassment when their children behave like undisciplined savages. Two minute time outs do zero to discipline children. When one of his children behaves in such manner around John and me, I can see the pure frustration and embarrassment in my son’s eyes and his body language. He knows I can read his signs, and that just compounds the whirlwind of feelings in the room. I can totally understand that his life is easier if the evidence of failed modern acceptable discipline results are not seen by me. When I explain how my young son was the happiest when his boundaries and known consequences were enforced, I also seem to lose any possible bond with my daughter-in-love.

2)   Gen X children are too busy to include their parents in their lives. Fair enough. But, we must ask why do they schedule themselves and their children 24/7/365 days a year? I don’t have a lot of answers here, but do know that their lives are so full of scheduled events, I worry that they have enough time with each other – much less time with John and I.

I remember watching my son being crushed under homework every night and most of his weekends when I made the decision to pull him out of the “gifted and talented” curriculum at school. I believe children need to be children, and that means they should let their imaginations run wild playing outside with other children. My children never met strangers, so they were really good at socializing. If you want to hear laughter in and around your home, you must let your children play outside until they smell like wet puppies.

It seems like our grandchildren’s playmates and best friends are their parents who take them to play dates, and birthday parties’ non-stop all year. On top of that they are taken to dance lessons, acrobatic lessons, piano lessons, and other kinds of lessons. When do these kids get to be in frequent free play outside developing not only social skills, but practical thinking on your feet skills?

3} Below are descriptions, an expert has given to the Boomers, and Gen X which most of our children were born into. I think it gives us some insight into the phenomenon of our children loving us from a distance.
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“BOOMERS Born 1946 – 1964

An amalgam of two distinct sub-sets:  the save-the-world revolutionaries of the ‘60s, followed by the self-improvement party’ers of the late ‘70s and early ‘80s.  Career-driven.  The Golden Generation in the American workplace.  Assertive.  Leaders.  Ethical.  Demanding.  Struggled with marriage and parenting.  America will now be a Boomer-led nation into the 2030’s.  This generation will never fully retire, and this is about to change America’s workplace, marketplace, and lifestyle profoundly.

GEN-X Born 1965 – 1981 – [My children were born 1973, and 1979.]

The latch-key kids grew up street-smart but isolated, often with divorced or time-starved dual-career parents.  Entrepreneurial.  Independent.  Creative.  Career “free agents”.  Feel disempowered and disengaged.  Eager to make marriage work and “be there” for their children.  Starting to chalk up some victories in life.  X’ers are rising.  They’ll lead America in the 2030’s and 2040’s.  They will give our nation excellent “idea leadership” but will need training to become good “people leaders”.

“FIRST-WAVE MILLENNIALS Born:  1982 – 1996 (and still coming!)” You can go find this group if you are interested. They are our grandchildren, and some late Boomer children – but, not the Boomer children we are thinking about in this commentary.

© 2009 The Generational Imperative, Inc. All rights reserved.

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The first thing I noticed is that the “expert” wrote something negative about the Gen X childhood because of their parents, and nothing about Boomer parents. I could write a book on how dysfunctional most Boomer homes were. If they were not actually divorcing, they were constantly threatening to. What sticks out most for me, is that because Boomer parents experienced the Depression as children, and WWII in their teen and young adult lives, they often lived through us – and even forcing us to be whom they wished they could have been as teens and young adults. It is hard to measure up to someone else’s dream. But, I digress . . . we are trying to understand why so many Gen X children have little time for their Boomer parents.

I believe that many Gen Xers hold some kind of a dual loving admiration and jealousy of who we Boomers were, and the world we lived in . . . let us look again at pieces of the Boomer description:

“Career-driven”

We Boomers were “fast trackers” – “movers and shakers” – well read – over educated – self-educated – an amazing society of engaged and successful people. We lived the American dream. White and Blue collar workers came together to achieve the most amazing advances in every industry on the planet. We enjoyed the last decades of true Capitalism, which made the Middle Class grow by leaps and bounds. If this was not Gen X parents, they felt like they were cheated. If it was their parents, they also felt cheated because we worked 55 hour work weeks to get ahead. At the time, we were determined to give our kids any advantage possible to insure their futures were as bright, or brighter than ours.

Somehow, many Gen Xers did not appreciate the link between the Middle Class lifestyle they enjoyed, and how hard we Boomers worked. It also seems probable that when Gen Xers size up todays often negative atmosphere for similar levels of endeavor, they have given up without showing true American Culture at its best, by peacefully fighting back to make the ultimate checks and balances of our government work, and answerable to We The People.

Many Boomers realized that the link between home, food, clothes, schools, entertainment, and the massive man/hours we worked to achieve the best we were capable of providing, was not translating to the values our children should have received by the process. Like many, determined to make them understand, I sent my Gen X teenagers out into the world to earn money after school, and summers.

I remember the first week my teen son worked on a concrete crew; a job I had attained for him. He railed against me for two weeks; claiming I was trying to kill him via jackhammer death in the crouched position to make holes in concrete for rebar. At the end of his second week, he received his first paycheck – and Katie Bar the Door!!!!!! This is undoubtedly the planted seed of why he works so hard and owns his own business. (I really need a smiley face here!) At the end of that summer he wanted to keep working and earning money, and screw school. Not a chance my genius son would be allowed to drop out!

My son received that job because of my connections. Jobs for teenagers in America was a part of our heritage. Due to open borders, the summer and after school jobs that should have been there for our teenaged Gen Xers, to build their young character on, went to adult illegal aliens. When they graduated and entered the workforce, not only did many have no experience to put on their resumes, but the national economic failures left few jobs for them to have. Even those who attained degrees were working for a fraction of what they dreamed, for so long, they would be earning.

Gen Xers by the thousands compared their lives to their parents, and it became easier to disconnect from us than to feel they had failed to keep their place among the Middle Class they were raised in.

Here is where Boomers can visualize good reason for resentment: The day of honorable Capitalism is gone. What our Gen Xers are experiencing is a government hostile to the small and medium business. Endless laws & regulations steal the fruits of their labor. Laws like Obamacare are designed to put a burden on the small and medium business that it cannot bear. What our Gen Xers are dealing with is CRONY Capitalism, whereby large international corporations and our own out of control government are in cahoots to destroy the Middle Class.

Giving away our Gen Xers industries, jobs, and tax dollars to illegal immigrants, and our enemies in foreign countries has done nothing to bring up the standards of any other country, and sold out our American Culture and Heritage. We Boomers understand that the Gen Xers blame us. What the Gen Xers do not understand is that until the last two decades, the deceptions of our government, the undermining of our schools, and the trashing of our economy was done covertly. The last two decades are on both the Boomer and the Gen Xers for allowing it to happen. Sadly, our Gen X children do not have the necessary tools to do a peaceful economic and government re-set . . . they scarcely understand what our American heritage / culture is, therefore they blame their Boomer parents for their “bad luck.”
4)  Major differences in the Boomers and our Gen X children which has caused division over time:

–     Fear. Boomers experienced some levels of fear in their young lives regarding assassinations of leaders, Cuban Missile Crisis, the Cold War, and Vietnam. This pales in comparison to a long list of major events our Gen X children have experienced in their young lives moving forward to the present day: being desensitized by the sex and violence on the big and little screen, 9/11, crazy dictators obtaining Nukes, the roller coaster economy, EMP threats, trying to determine why there is government insistence on a debunked Global Warming – and all the business smothering regulations created because of it, terrorist threats including biological warfare, never ending wars and rumors of wars, explosive economy with constant threats of a dollar collapse.

–     Faith. Boomers were raised in an atmosphere of Christian principles and values, and a strong family unit. Even if Boomers were not actively attending church, or even Christian, society’s principles and values was the choice of America. 93% of Americans were Christian when I graduated high school in 1970. Of course there were criminals, because we are flawed humans. Most Christians in the 60’s considered themselves “born again,” gospel believing, Christians who were positively changed on the day they accepted the Lord into their lives.

The Christianity of today must largely be the apostate kind with weak principles and values, because we have millions of secularists telling us that evil or bad is just as valid for living as those principles and values that I have carried with me from my childhood forward. Today 78% of Americans are “Christians.” They do not like the crime levels, and ignored American Christian principles and values any more than I do, but they are willing to say your god and my God are the same god, and “whatever” when you try to tie them down on living in a Christian America. Just one quick example, in a sea of examples we could live by . . . we would have to throw out 95% of our television and movie content to bring our lives in line with Christian principles and values.

Due to my upbringing, Boomers expected to be instrumental in our children having a better life than we did. Due to my son’s upbringing, he expects to be instrumental in his children having a better life.
In the long run, and looking at the rule, and not the exception, our expectations will not be met, and more so for my dear grandchildren.

I do not have all of the answers as to why so many of our Gen Xers have distanced themselves from parents they love and respect. The several reasons above are part of the phenomenon. I have read that America has twice turned around inside of six months back to the Lord, and Christian principles and values. Is it possible for this to happen when so many are just making it through each day the best they can, and isolating those from their lives that may be able to help them more spiritually than the apostate church / secular church that is sweeping up our Gen Xers – if they even bother with church at all.

Many, many Boomers have abandoned our churches, recognizing them for the changed entities they are in the process of becoming. THE CHURCH IS THE BODY OF CHRIST. There should never have been division, upon division, upon division of The Christian Church. Along with these divisions – departing from our foundational Christian teachings for man-made denominational religions – departing from the worship in Jewish homes in the early church for man-made cathedrals and statues with so much money it could have fed the world over and over for decades.

My Mother’s Day card from my son, “Mom, I’ve been thinking of all the great memories from being your son! Thank you for all the fun and love I experienced through my life because of you!!” This doesn’t sound like a Gen X son who neglects his relationship with his mother. It is like my Gen Xer is away at some insane camp that Boomers are not allowed into. They know what we would say and do. The “wisdom of grandparents” is not something these Gen Xers are willing to allow into their lives, and their children’s lives. It would not be convenient to the image they have of themselves, when we are near and dear.

As I stated in Part One, I am always open to any ideas you have for solving this heart wrenching problem. How do we bring our Gen Xers back into our lives, and the whole country back to the Lord? It is true that all of the above is almost mind numbing when you consider it all together, but each issue needs to be reconciled before there is unity in our families. There is so much division in our land that is described as political, racial, ethical, etc. etc. etc. I know that our willingness to live with these political issues, without calling the leaders out for lying about every division they have caused, has left the nation in sad repair. Perhaps if we could solve the divisions between generations first, we could then tackle the rest of it together.

Copyright © 2015 by Juanita Holloway-Walters

All Rights Reserved

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RUNNING IN CIRCLES – NEED YOUR ADVICE

You know I try to write only when I have something to say, and I am still here. When I worked, I worked circles around others, while training them to take my place. Today, the effects of 35 years of illness (and over 20 of those hiding it), and effects of necessary medications, I am more likely running in circles. I love to cook, and it has not escaped me that activity lasts 2 to 3 hours – and there is closure as we eat the things I cook. That equals feeling successful day to day. When I clean out a chest of drawers or a closet, it is such a successful high, I get John to take me out to celebrate. Me getting gussied up to even a fraction of younger glory is cause to have an adult beverage. (That is limited to only one drink a few times a year due to medications.)

What I am doing – to do a NEW set of commentaries  . . .

Writing some commentaries about sin – and I started them yesterday  by writing the introduction. . .

Needed scripture from Matthew, found it, but . . .

Remembered it is one of the books I must study in detail – so far about 8 hrs on Chapter One, and about 2 hrs. on Chapter Two . . .

Had an epiphany about a book need to co – write with John and re – outlined 14 Chapters.

Remembered my Daughter in love gave me a 1938 copy of Crime and Punishment and I still want to read it and I started today, appropriate to the commentaries . . .

AND Here is where I need your wisdom:

There is the HUGE parent / adult child issue with my 36 year old STILL taking up valuable brain time! He apparently doesnt understand respect, in the way I do . . . and the most important difference between talk and action – and I get from him that in some unexplained way it is my fault? Not a chance . . . Action woman here that raised him. Love him. My pendulum was in the other extreme, I could never tell my Mamma no. I need to figure this out so I can let the issue go. Love my kids madly! It would be fair to say that I was the primary working provider in their young lives . . . And also enjoyed their company and being fun Mommy . . . when I wasn’t being Strict Mommy bearer of Consequences!

So here is the issue, and any wise words you could share with me would be appreciated. Oh, not a chance he reads my blog posts, and they are not on FB. He listens to books while driving from business clients to the office to picking up kids to home to wherever . . . Not a reader like me – he does also have his fathers genes.

Issue: If I dont call him, I wouldn’t hear from him but MAYBE 6 times a year. His words: Mom, anyone who talks to me, or sees me, knows they have to call and make an appointment in my life – even my clients know this. I am too busy to remember to call you or stop in to see you. I should clarify that he and his wife own their own business.

When John and I lived 30 minutes away, the excuse was that we just lived too far away. We moved – 8 minutes door to door. He tells me that as he and my grand daughters pass by where we live every day, the girls wave and say, Hi Grandmama in my general direction.

Over the years , I did call him, for him to tell me he had another call, and he would call me back – which he rarely did. Case in point. Even the day at the VA when we learned about my husbands stage 4 cancer, and I excused myself as John was winding up with the doctor – I ran outside crying and called my son, needing his support, and he said he would call me back, but did not. I understand business is important . . . But?

So, recently he expands the ‘you call me’ theory of conduct. Even his martial arts class is a scheduled event 2 nights a week . . . As well as “boys night out ” for him, and “baby sit his own children”  night for his wife to get out. There is church on Wednesdays, and Sundays where he drives the bus to pick up and drop off the old people, and there is their young couples class and church . . . And the various ways in which his wife’ s family depends on him – good example is all those females telling him he will be the one to spend nights in the hospital with his father- in – law because he is so hard to handle. That is a true statement. Saturdays are for all the birthday parties his children attend, and in the evenings the adults socializing with their friends.

I totally get that he is supposed to leave his parents, and cleave unto his wife . . . But I didnt find the part in scripture where you only talk to and see your mother 4 times a year. (Christmas, each grand-girl’s birthday, and the day before Mothers Day.) I have flat out told him that I need his support in my life. He replied that he needed me in his life too. Right . . .

I am so ready to stop feeling hurt over this. About once a day my thoughts go to my son, and in prayer for a happy solution. I was the one who called and planned get togethers for many years. John and I are battling his cancer, my escalated degenerative diseases, and some awful side affects of taking meds long term now. I thought my son would step up and be a uniting force in all this. I did try to say, okay, we will eat dinner, all of us, every Friday, since the rest of the week is filled already with other people and places. It happened once, and I was told we would do it on a Friday to Friday basis because their boys and girls nights out were much needed and on Fridays.

Either the answer to my prayers are no, or The Lord is telling me to be even more patient. OR?

Copyright © 2015 by Juanita Holloway-Walters

All Rights Reserved

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Bussed in violence is home grown terrorism.

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This is where the heart of the nation should be. What we are witnessing is a manipulation of our population – by those who choose to rule us instead of the jobs we elected them to do. If we were self-governing citizens as our Constitution originally designed the citizenry would be, we would have kicked them out of office  –  and kicked the ghetto pimps off the airwaves. My Boomer generation did all we could do to bring up our children color blind. It makes me sick to see the division this administration and it’s minions have created — but even more sick that Americans have allowed themselves to be used – and useless.

Copyright © 2015 by Juanita Holloway-Walters

All Rights Reserved

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I KNOW WHEN LIFE BEGINS . . .

In this time between the celebration of our Lord’s birth, and His resurrection, the truth of Communion keeps coming to my mind.  In remembrance of our Lord . . .

“Matthew 26:26 – 29 (KJV) And as they were eating, Jesus took bread, and blessed it, and brake it, and gave it to the disciples, and said, Take, eat; this is my body. And he took the cup, and gave thanks, and gave it to them, saying, Drink ye all of it; For this is my blood of the new testament, which is shed for many for the remission of sins. But I say unto you, I will not drink henceforth of this fruit of the vine, until that day when I drink it new with you in my Father’s kingdom.”

Satan’s desire to thwart God’s plans shows itself in millennium before, and since Jesus time on Earth with mankind. Prophecies regarding our Lord and human history have been interwoven with man’s fiction to create all manner of Cults and grouping of men hell bent on destroying the truth by deception. Not least of which are those that ridicule Communion. For Christian believers, this emotional event is in remembrance of our Lord coming to be with us in human form, and the work of the Cross. In sacrificing His life-blood to cover our sins, He is our savior and our redeemer.

In thinking on this, there was something in this reality of the Lord’s shed blood that I was missing. Then it came to me – the simplest of thoughts – the dimension of life that we all know, but somehow our Supreme Court couldn’t seem to grasp when deciding Roe vs. Wade . . . without blood, there is no beating heart, or working organs in our bodies. Without blood coursing through our veins, there is no life to the body that houses our souls. The Supremes in Roe vs. Wade would not define when life began, and made their decision based on THAT! So very clever a ruse as has ever been perpetrated on mankind.

If you are Christian, the new fetus in our womb is the moment life begins inside our body. We know that we existed in God’s knowing before that moment: “Jeremiah 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee.”

As it turns out, if you are not Christian, the same “moment of life” beginning inside our body is true. I found it easily. I even found it in a source that every school child can find – the Encyclopedia Britannica:

“In the human embryo, the first site of blood formation is the yolk sac. Later in embryonic life, the liver becomes the most important red blood cell-forming organ, but it is soon succeeded by the bone marrow”

Where there is human blood forming, there is life – Period. I further learned that the child’s DNA is in that new blood – the child’s DNA is unique, and wholly separate from the DNA of the mother. We each have God’s truth coursing through our veins. The lie was created to thwart God’s plan, and our shame for allowing this is almost too great to bear. If we ask His forgiveness, we will be forgiven . . . but to continue – is to ask for His wrath. Why we have not heard this from every Christian pulpit in America, I cannot even begin to understand. We are to be diligent truth finders – and this one wasn’t hard to find.

This new government program nicknamed Obamacare promotes the death of our unborn children. Court cases are being fought to force Christians to participate in abortion funding, and distribution. This fact should have been the first clue of the deception of the entire program. After centuries of medical research to improve and extend our lives, social medicine seeks not only to deny men, women, and children equally of these medicinal miracles, but to force participation in the death of unborn miracles. It will not be doctors deciding what medical miracles you may or may not have, it will be brain washed, and power infused administrators. This political disaster has come into fruition because of evil intent by giving the glorious illusion of redistribution of health care, when, in the full implementation of Obamacare – as evidenced in the wording of the bill, even that is a lie.

As we approach these weeks before Easter, I ask you to pray on this daily. I believe in miracles . . . especially when more than just a couple of us are praying together. God bless you.

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THE MORALITY OF LIFE – IF YOU CHOOSE CHRISTIANITY

Today is 9/11/13 and I searched my heart and soul to understand the many, many ways American leadership, and Americans in general, has become increasingly depraved since this date in 2001. Last night President Obama asked us to side with the rebels in Syria, in which our 9/11/01 enemy Al-Qaida is a prominent portion of the Syrian rebels, as well as the Muslim Brotherhood. I do not recognize my country anymore. What is wrong with America for this to be our reality? What kind of Americans would allow such insanity? I broke America’s problems down to the lowest common denominator, and I am not surprised by what I found at the base of our troubles.

Our American children are taught the THEORY of Evolution as fact. When you teach children that they are the product of pond scum or inferior animals, their view of “human life” demeans man’s existence on planet Earth. The attitude of the American child becomes one of a subservient instead of a person enjoying freedom. We are seeing the atrocities committed around the entire world by anti-life and anti-Godly people. The modern Liberalists are preaching an anti-life secular view in our American courts, in our American schools, and in our American entertainments. America’s modern generations have succumbed to anti-life philosophies.

From the Bible . . . Jeremiah 1:4-6 King James Version (KJV) “Then the word of the Lord came unto me, saying, before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. Then said I, Ah, Lord God! behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child.”

By way of my Christian faith I understand my full value as a child of God. I am God’s amazing, thinking, speaking, reasoning, loving, and knowing creation. When I think on John 3:16 KJV “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life,” I fully understand how sinful it is to teach our children they are not God’s creation – and how destructive it is to our human existence. God gave us each free will, and you can choose to think of yourself as pond scum, or of the righteous value of being created by my Christian God, in His image.

If you choose Christianity and therefore God our creator, I would ask you to consider the entire Bible for your learning and understanding, for the Bible is God’s word for believers. Polls have revealed that only ten percent of America’s Christians have read and studied the entire Bible. For the sake of communicating the value of life in this comparatively short commentary I chose the Jeremiah verses above. God is involved in the creation of every baby in the womb. The mutual sexual union of human male and human female brings about life in the womb at inception, and the Lord knows who that child is before you do. Very early in the formation of the child, we can hear it’s heartbeat with the aid of a Doppler. How we could possibly end any child’s life and snuff out its heartbeat is beyond my Christian understanding. We certainly cannot ignore the fact that each of us was created in the womb in the same way.  We would not be here if our parents had decided to ignore the fact that God knows who we are at our inception.

If we nurture the life God knows in our wombs, then we are able through our connection to the Lord to banish all manner of evil in our society. This belief in life at conception, and being known by God at inception – is the basis for our American existence – Life, as a child of God – Liberty, because the Lord loves us – and Pursuit of Happiness is possible because of our being connected to God through His Holy Spirit. I pray for Americans to wake up from their secular slide, and to first cherish the life God created us and in our babies before they are brought into the world, so they are nurtured into a good society of Godly people. Such a people will have God’s providence and protection. Such a people derive their rights from God, and therefore, their rights are righteous in healthy society. Such a people are self-governing, which turns the wheels of successful endeavor. Successful endeavor of Godly people is the element of society that we are sorely missing in today’s America.

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MR. PRESIDENT – PUT YOUR MONEY WHERE YOUR WORDS HAVE BEEN

Why America puts up with this crap while a single child goes hungry is beyond me . . .as the President said about ridiculous gun hampering . . . if it saves one child . . . Okay Mr President – put your money where your mouth is and scrub your Africa vacations and feed hungry American kids . . .
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LIFE CHANGING QUESTIONS . . . CATEGORY THREE:

  • Because every dime you spend buying illegal drugs makes some crooked politicians rich . . .
  • Because the war on drugs has not worked – period . . .
  • Because every dime you spend buying illegal drugs funds some terrorist organization . . .
  • Because every dime you spend buying illegal drugs takes away from important purchases you could make such as an education, a home, clothes for your kids, food for the hungry, a vehicle to get around in, a boat to have fun in, medicine for the needy, a vacation for you or your family . .
  • Because every dime you spend buying illegal drugs props up rogue governments . . .
  • Because history shows us that taking drugs can ruin your health and / or your brain . . .
  • Because the drug cartels murder innocent people, and enslave others . . .
  • Because drugs can kill you . . .
  • Because drugs help you avoid life . . .

WHY NOT JUST STOP?

– NO MATTER HOW HARD IT IS
– JUST STOP!!!!!!!

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LIFE CHANGING QUESTIONS – CATEGORY ONE . . .

Considering the approximately 245 million adults in America –

And considering only 2.5% consider themselves “gay” –

And considering the gross majority of children raised in “straight” homes wind up “straight” –

And considering the new statistics* from children raised in “gay” homes, that the majority
wind up “gay” –

And considering the studies in abundance that tell us that the most well-adjusted children
come from a home where there is a Mother and a Father –

Why are Americans allowing our schools, our elected and appointed officials, and our
entertainment to radically push the “gay” agenda?

Why wouldn’t ALL adults wish for ALL of our children the opportunity to have a traditional
heterosexual relationship leading to marriage, where children are born from the male and
female relationship as our Creator designed us?

Why would anyone call me a hater if I wish for parents, schools, our elected and appointed
officials, and our entertainment to influence the maximum number of children towards the
family life that has proven for eons to be the fulfilling experience of natural procreation?

———————
* New Study On Homosexual Parents Tops All Previous Research
By Peter Sprigg Senior Fellow for Policy Studies
Family Research Council
http://www.frc.org/issuebrief/new-study-on-homosexual-parents-tops-all-previous-research

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A MATTER OF URGENCY IF WE ARE TO BE A HUMANE PEOPLE

I try not to bore anyone who happens upon my blog, or my friends for whom I post items on FB. For that reason, I do not post every day. When you see a post from me, you will know I thought it worth my time and yours.

At the end of this short writing is a video from Ted Cruz that I recommend. As I listened to Senator Cruz, I am singularly proud of this statesman, and I pray he continues to be an honorable man. I do feel compelled to give testimony to young women regarding how they will feel in future decades about decisions made as a young adult.

My first child is 40 years old – a healthy and lovely girl child born in spite of my health problems specific to being female. My second child miscarried early in the second trimester. Such sorrow, I cannot adequately describe in words. Seen by several specialists for a few years, I was told it would be doubtful I would conceive again, and if I did, I wouldn’t be able to carry the child.

My now ex-husband declared to me that if I could not give him a son, he wanted a divorce. A marriage killing statement, however, I was pregnant at the time this was declared, and we just didn’t know it yet. Our son was born a month early and suffered an “immature stomach” for a few months. Once my son was a few months old, he became a very healthy child. The child survived ominous declarations when I first began visits to the obstetrician. Today, my son is 34 years old.

The post delivery weeks were difficult for many reasons. I was the chief bread-winner and the more responsible adult in my marriage. I returned to work at 2 weeks even though I was experiencing some debilitating medical post-delivery problems. I became pregnant almost immediately after giving birth to my son. I was back at work 2 months when I was told by my Ob/Gyn that I was pregnant, I would not be able to carry the child, – and he had scheduled a D&C for me early the next morning to stop the severe “.” problems. (This is difficult to talk about, but if you guys can suffer through the television commercials on this subject, I guess I can muddle through this testimony.) The decision had been made for me. My health would deteriorate more than it already had if I didn’t do something immediately.

I checked into the hospital that same evening. In looking back, I see now that it was odd that a nurse spent considerable time talking to me until I took a sleeping pill and went to sleep for the night. She was very reassuring that what I was doing was good for my health, and so I could work and take care of my family.

This is a story I have rarely told anyone. For those of you who think of terminating a pregnancy, my message is simple – – – Even though I was only a few weeks pregnant, and my health was at risk, and I was the person my children could count on to be a responsible parent  . . . I regret being such a ninny at that time in my life and allowing my judgement to be completely influenced by another. To this day, the possibility of a 3rd child still haunts me, and I regret that decision made so many years ago.

I am sixty years old, and I regret a decision I made over three decades ago. America’s biggest shame is that she has passed laws that allow the deaths of millions of babies. What kind of society kills it’s own. It doesn’t matter if it is a 6 week pregnancy, or a later term pregnancy, what is wrong is wrong. We do not congratulate someone who is happily announcing that they are going to have a baby – congratulations on your fetus . . . NO . . . we congratulate them on the fact that they are going to have a baby.

God forgave me, and I forgave me . . . but that will never erase the loss of a possibility that I would have cherished as much as I cherish the children I did bring into this world. I pray for all young people to chose life. Choosing life is never a wrong decision.

Well, I am sad to tell you there is more to what I know . . . I knew a woman who chose a late term abortion, and she and the baby died. It is not my story to tell, but I can tell you this . . . she died because she went to a back woods hack to have her late term abortion. If I were Mr. Cruz and other Senators, I would pass a bill so strong against anything like a back woods abortion hack, that no person would take the chance of doing that.

So, here I am at a turn in the road of my convictions . . . I vehemently preach against abortions . . . I have known too many women who regret having done it . . . I also vehemently preach against back woods abortion hacks . . . I would prefer those who must have an abortion to have it done in a sterile hospital operating room – and never after the first trimester. All I can actively do is pray for America to turn from her acceptance of practices that make our culture rather barbaric, and share with women that even in my circumstances of so many years ago, I still regret my actions

So, here we see the dilemma we are faced with. America’s solution has been to grant abortions a-la-carte or carte blanch. I support legislation that brings those who are uninformed, to become informed of what their choice means to them and to their child. We must each ask ourselves why there are so many liberal thinkers who fight against some reasonable, and educational steps before any abortion. Seeing a film of the child in the womb from conception to birth should be the bare minimum of education on the subject. Those who are against this process are fighting to kill babies in uneducated women – why? I would think that those against this process need to enlighten us as to why they are against the pregnant woman understanding exactly what is happening inside her womb.

These same abortion minded people are against a 3-day waiting period. Why? I have done a lot of reading on this subject, and no one has given a sound reason why a 3-day waiting period is wrong. The same crowd that preaches that a child cannot even take an aspirin in school unless there has been parental consent given, are against that same parent knowing if their child has an abortion, or is receiving birth control.

I would like to point out that when I graduated from high-school in 1970, only one person in my class had a child in her teen years. What was so different? We were not educated on the thrills and techniques of sex in school. We were not offered birth control at school. We lived in a moral society, that frowned upon sex before marriage. Based on results, I highly recommend we return to teaching our children how to live in a moral society – without any public school contradicting what we chose to teach our children.

The following is a short video from Senator Ted Cruz, speaking on the Senate floor. I pray you all cheer him on in this endeavor, as well as many other endeavors which will be a catalyst for turning the morality of American society back to the days when abortions did not kill our progeny.

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